TPM and Conflict Resolution

Accept Conflict Management Role: TPM role brings together people from multiple teams, functions, departments and sometimes even companies. Conflicts will come up when so much coordination and cooperation is involved. Even if you are a type of a person who avoids conflicts, know that a TPM may see them often and sometimes with very little control on their causes. This can be very unsettling especially for TPMs early in career, hence early acceptance is the key.

Proactively Anticipate Conflicts: Ideally, as a TPM, you are expected to be proactive in anticipation of potential conflicts and nip them in the bud. Generally, there are clear signs when things start moving towards a conflict e.g. are you seeing a partner slipping on dates which may impact you later, is a team member dissatisfied with the assigned responsibilities etc.

Understand the Conflict: What is causing the conflict? Is it lack of communication/miscommunication, misunderstanding, changes in the priorities or environment etc. Who are the parties involved in the conflict? What is at stake in this conflict. Is this tactical or does it have long term consequences?

Choose your Battles: Many conflicts can be avoided if you choose to accept the consequences of agreeing to other party’s ask. Sometimes, there is more effort/churn needed to resolve a conflict rather the what’s at stake. Pick your battles wisely.

Listen/Listen/Listen: Depending on the situation, you may want to listen to the all parties separately. Having the opportunity to be heard may relieve/soften them significantly before you put them together in a room.

Avoid Email/IM: Conflicts are best resolved in person/ video/ audio conferencing in diminishing order of return. The tone of Emails and IMs may be perceived very differently between the sender and receiver. Any sign of conflict and get the conversation out of email, either walk to the desk of the person or pick up the phone.

Separate Issues with Personalities: Always assume the best intent from the other side and avoid making it a person issue. Once it turns into a personality conflict then finding a resolution becomes more difficult. Putting in some effort to see things from other person’s perspective will should help significantly.

Provide Options/Trade-offs: In many situations, different options/trade-offs may be acceptable for all parties. Putting in some thought to come up with options shows that you have done your homework and you are flexible.

Conflict Resolution Meeting: If you end up calling one, make sure all stakeholders and decision makers are there. Keep the atmosphere light. Even if it gets intense, stay firm and respectful. Do not let it slide into a shouting match and even if it does become one, keep your composure. You will be appreciated for it later!

Document Conflict Resolution: Once conflict is resolved, it’s important to note down the resolution and socialize it with all the stakeholders. This will avoid any confusions on the resolution agreement and next steps.

 Tracking Conflict Related Communications: You may need to manage all communications around a conflict. Sometimes, these may be dispersed across emails, IMs, meeting notes etc. If it is a cross group or cross organization conflict, you want to keep track and organize these items in away they are easily accessible and presentable to management.

 Avoid Escalations: While it may be required to keep your manager updated on a conflict, its better to avoid pulling them in resolution unless required. This has multiple disadvantages – It portrays that you could not resolve the conflict at your level and second people harden their positions in front of their management.

 Keep Eye on the Big Picture: This differentiates a tactical thinker from a strategic one. You may let the other party cut some slack if you know it will not impact the project timeline or budget etc. Keep your eyes on the big picture and let small items go by.

 Avoid Burning Bridges: In the corporate world, re-organization happen frequently, employees also change teams and groups. The person sitting on the other side of the table in a conflict may also become your coworker or manager someday! So, it’s not about ‘winning’ the conflict. It’s about achieving mutual objectives.

 Conflict as Growth Opportunity: Conflict is also an opportunity to meet people with differing viewpoints. How you behave under stress and treat people will be noticed. It is an opportunity to showcase and build your brand.

 Conflict Postmortem: Depending on the scale of conflict, there may be value in setting up a postmortem. It may help you figuring out how this conflict could have been avoided or handled better. This is especially useful for large scale conflicts between multiple partner teams.

 Conflict within the Team: While a bit of healthy tension may help folks keep each other accountable, too much of it can be draining and impact productivity. It is important to be aware if the team is in forming, storming, norming or performing stage. You may need to tweak the process or management style as appropriate.

 Trust Training: In the agile environment things move very fast. Documenting each decision and expectation may not be realistic. Team needs to have high level of trust among them. If the trust level is low, you may want to invest in Trust Building Training.

 Conflict resolution may be a a quick 5-minute conversation or end up dragging into multiple meetings involving multi-layer management and leadership. Higher the visibility of the conflict, more important it is to be well organized and having a sound narrative around your position. Accepting it as a part of your role, keeping a positive attitude and not letting them overwhelm you will position you well to deal them successfully!